Save Yourselves While You Still Can
It's official, I'm calling it now, at 10:52PM (GMT -5) Barack Obama has been elected President of the United States of America. I suggest to all of those still in America, board up your homes and stock up on food and ammunition. An army of crazed communist-terrorist-socialists will soon be ravaging this once wholesome land like the Mongols ravaged Asia so many centuries ago.
They'll pillage and plunder, spreading the wealth and aborting babies wherever they roam. No one is safe. Death will follow in their wake. The real America will be burned to the ground, and from its ashes a communist-hippie-terrorist haven will rise, where American flags are used as napkins and bath tissue, where they are no guns, and where kindergartners are made to watch pornography as part of some deranged liberal sex education. America as we know it is dead. Do not return to her my friends, for all you will find is the beaten disfigured corpses of freedom, liberty, and the free market system. May God have mercy on our souls for all is lost. I'm sorry but I must make haste to the bunker, the horde is almost upon us.
But really, he won, yeah!
-Doug B.
Comments
Ms McFloozy is sure hoping some of that wealth gets spread my way, cuz in the previous redistributions of wealth it seemed to be spreading the other direction.
I am hoarding jam and frisbees.
California polls close in 14 seconds!
Posted by: McFloozy | November 5, 2008 4:00 AM
I'm so glad we are over HERE away from all of the mayhem!
T
Posted by: Tracy | November 6, 2008 6:56 AM